10.22.2015

A New Chapter

Tomorrow is somewhat of a bittersweet day for me. Like a lot of us, I spent four long years getting a college education in preparation for my career in marketing. I was blessed to find a great job right out of college. I have learned an enormous amount about my industry and have been lucky to work with a wonderful group of professional colleagues. However, tomorrow afternoon I will pack up my office and start a new job, a job that I've been waiting for my entire life. I will trade in my title as Director of Marketing and Communication for the title of Mommy. 

The decision for me to stay home with Charlie Beth after she is born is one that Steven and I (mostly I) stressed over for weeks if not months. After weighing all of our options we came to the conclusion that the best thing for our family would be for me to stay at home with our baby girl instead of returning to work after she is born. There were so many factors that went into making our decision, but at the end of the day, we know that this is the best decision for our family.

Honestly, it's a dream come true to have the opportunity to stay home with our little girl. Becoming a stay at home mom is something that I imagined myself doing one day, but once the reality of adulthood hit and the bills continued to pile in I pretty much gave up on that idea. When I got pregnant the idea of staying at home with our baby really didn't cross my mind. I assumed I would take the maximum allotted maternity leave, find the best possible childcare option, and continue working my full time position. The further I got into pregnancy, however, the more I started to question and stress over our "plan."

I started researching child care options early on in my pregnancy. Being a former Nanny myself, I strongly considered the idea of hiring a Nanny while Steven and I worked. I knew how much I love and adore the baby I was a Nanny for and I wanted nothing more than to find someone like that to care for our daughter. Unfortunately there are very limited options out there, and the cost of a full time Nanny is pretty astronomical. Our next option was daycare. I called around to several different daycare centers in our area and found a few that we considered a possibility. When we realized the cost of daycare wasn't that much different than the cost of a nanny, we began to question our entire plan.

I came across this article the other day on Faceboook, and found myself nodding in agreement while reading. When Steven and I started crunching numbers we realized that at the end of the month, our daycare bill would be more than our mortgage payment. What?! That's absolutely insane to me!

The breaking point for me came one day while driving to work. I was talking to Steven on the phone about our childcare options and literally broke down in tears. I didn't want to leave my baby with anyone. I want to be the one to teach her, cuddle her, feed her, and watch her take in the world around her. I want to be there. It was then and there that we made our decision. Steven calmly told me to take a deep breath and stop stressing. We both realized that for our family, it just isn't economically reasonable for me to go back to work after the baby is born. It isn't worth giving up that time with her. It isn't worth shelling over the majority of my paycheck to a childcare provider. It isn't worth all the stress and tears.

I am incredibly blessed. Not only is my dream of becoming a mommy coming true, but my dream of staying home and raising her is also becoming a reality. On top of that, my company has agreed to keep me on board working a few hours a week from home. It's definitely a win, win situation for our family.

However, what's best for one family isn't always best for another. We are all working hard to provide for our family. For some families it is necessary for the mother and father to work outside of the home. There are simply no other options. I also have friends that couldn't imagine not getting up everyday and going into work. It is what makes them tick and it's their passion and I completely understand where they are coming from. It is a very personal decision for each and every family. For our family, we believe it best that I stay home with Charlie Beth while my husband, who works harder than anyone I've ever met, continues to provide for us. Transitioning down to one income is going to be a challenge, but it is a challenge that we are ready to face head on.

At the end of the day we all have to do what works best for our families and what makes each of us the happiest. No two families are alike and no two situations are the same. Most importantly, I think we all must support and respect whatever decisions a Mother and Father make for their family regarding the decision for one parent to stay home after the birth of a baby.

For me, I am more than ready to turn off my office lights tomorrow afternoon and begin my new role as Mommy. I can't wait to see what this new chapter in our lives will bring!
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21 comments :

  1. Thanks for sharing your story, certainly needed to hear that today!

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  2. SO excited for you!!! It is so obvious that you were made to be a mom! You are going to rock this new chapter :)

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  3. So excited for you and this next step in life! Cheers to you having the best job now!

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  4. I am so happy for you. Eric and I were just having this deep conversation last night actually. No decisions have been made yet, but all the evidence points to the fact that something has to give. I thought I could make "part time" work. Meaning just about 25-30 hours a week but when that is stacked up next to my daughter and the housework something has to give and it is not going to be time with my daughter. You are a lucky lady for figuring it out early! I cant wait to see your little one.

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  5. This is exciting news! I am starting to research all this now! So so happy you will be able to raise that baby the way you want to!

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  6. Sounds exciting that you get to do what you've always wanted!! Happy that you are able to do what you are most excited about, being a mommy!! Congrats to you and S! :-)

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  7. Thank you for being open and honest and vulnerable in sharing this decision. I often wonder how couples decide on what to do regarding work after their child is born, and this was so perfect. I am not in this phase of life just yet, but the insight is truly remarkable. You are going to be an amazing mom and I look forward to many, many pictures and posts about parenthood and little miss Charlie!

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  8. That's great! You're very lucky to have the finances to be able to do that! It will be amazing to stay home with her and watch her grow!

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  9. I'm so thrilled for you! Of course, like you said, there are so many things that go into making that decision, and every family is different, but I have LOVED being a SAHM and am so happy you have the opportunity to do so. You will love it :)

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  10. So happy for you!!! I relate to this in every way and I know you're going to love it. I couldn't imagine leaving my baby either.. I'm lucky to be able to work from home. It's the most amazing thing being able to spend every second with your daughter! I never looked into childcare prices.. but from what I've heard from friends it really does cost a small fortune

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  11. How wonderful for you!!! That will be such a relief in so many ways. I am realizing that blogging might be the thing that makes it a possibility for one of us to stay at home when we have children. Childcare is so incredibly expensive and it truly just isn't worth it. Then still when your baby is sick, you have to take a day (or five) off, when they have field trips you will want to go, etc etc. Being a full time mommy will be amazing!

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  12. I'm so happy you get to do this!!

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  13. So excited and happy for you! You will love every single second! It is such a fun and incredible journey. Everyday is different and a new adventure!

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  14. Congratulations to you! Motherhood is such a wonderful journey & there will definitely be some days that you feel like throwing in the towel, but it is so worth it to be home with your little babe. What an exciting time for you! Enjoy every second of it :) xox

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  15. YAY! Congratulations on the next chapter of your lives!

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  16. Even though the cost of daycare is so high the amount of money we would lose not going into retirement scared me even more. Retiring and being able to live in the lifestyle I'm accustomed to is so important to me! And on top of that we still have to save for the baby's education. There's just a lot of saving. It gets overwhelming to think about. Plus I'm scared of something happening to Chris and then having to reenter the work force. Ugh. I feel like the option of being able to be a stay at home mom is just so unavailable for us! However, I also don't want to give up my career either - what do they call that a catch 22?! LOL. I'm really glad you guys were able to find a way to make it workfor y'all! I'm all about mom's and dad's having that choice girl! I'm excited to follow y'alls journey, being a mom is so much fun and is such a blessing.

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  17. I'm SO excited for you, I know it's a hard choice to make, I've shed so many tears over returning to work. At this time we have free part time childcare (thanks Mom!) and I need to return to work part time. But I have the goal to eventually shut off my office lights as well, and it's wonderful to have that to look forward to. I'm glad that you know you are doing what is best for your family. You have so many precious memories ahead!! I can't wait to see you flourish in your new role. Any day now!

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  18. You're going to be such an amazing Mommy!!! And you will get to meet this little love bug so so soon!

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  19. That's so awesome you were able to do that! I would love to stay at home, but right now it's more cost effective for us for me to continue working, even if we are paying hundreds a month for childcare. Maybe some day! You're right... we all need to do what we feel is best for our family. You will LOVE getting to stay home with your baby, I'm sure! I absolutely did not want to leave mine!

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  20. Congrats to you!! As a work from home mom myself - you will love it!

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  21. http://www.avalonentries.com/ The photos are amazing!

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