Before Steven and I got married my parents joked that he "really needed to live with me before committing to spending his life with me." Well, I say it was a joke, but I'm fairly certain they were serious about it. I was serious about it too. I'm difficult to live with. You can ask my college roommates or you can ask my husband. I'm know that they will agree with that statement.
Steven and I moved in together eight months before we got married. It made the most sense financially and emotionally, and it was a decision that we were both certain about. But, even with the excitement of moving in with my fiance, I was a sad to be giving up my alone time. I was certain that moving in with Steven would mean that I would have to say goodbye to any and all time that I had to myself.
Thankfully I realized early on that this was certainly not the case. In fact, I came to realize that not only would I still have "me" time, but that it was important to carve out time where I could get away and spent an few hours to myself. The thing is, as much as I adore spending time with my husband, I also need time alone where I can pour a glass of wine and watch Sex and the City or open a book and draw a bubble bath.
My husband needs his time as well. Sure, his "me" time doesn't consist of a bottle of wine and Sex and the City (at least not to my knowledge..), but it does consist of things that he enjoys doing. His "me" time is usually spent playing softball with his friends or walking around Bass Pro Shop. Just a few hours a week to get away and do the things he loves.
Early on in our relationship I felt guilty about our time spent apart. What does it say about me as a wife if I don't want to spend every second of the day with the man I'm going to spend my future with? I'll tell you what it says about me, it says that I am normal. I'm a normal women who looks forward to weekend Netflix binges cuddled on the couch with my husband, but doesn't mind spending an occasional evening alone while he plays softball with his friends. It's perfectly healthy. It's healthy to have our own outlets and our own way to unwind after a long week. It's important that we maintain our own identity even though we are building this life together.
At the end of the day, however, my favorite part about my time spent alone is giving my husband a hug and kiss when my "me" time is over and he comes walking in the door. Because as much as I love a few hours to myself, I couldn't imagine living life without him. I couldn't imagine coming home after work without him greeting me at the front door. I couldn't imagine cooking dinner at night without sharing it with him. I couldn't imagine finding a new show to indulge in without watching it with him. I couldn't imagine working on home projects without him by my side. I couldn't imagine going to bed night after night without him by my side. I couldn't imagine going through it all without him next to me.